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| You looked so happy. Happy with a secret.
i finally got around to see Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. and i dont think it was a good idea. it just brought up my past. and more thinking. am i really over him? i mean i im pretty sure i am. but then again i get so sad thinking of that situation.
Blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders.
i wish there was a way i could erase that memory. because i would, in a heartbeat. but then i think, you cant mess with the law of nature, and eventually he would come back into my life again. but at least for an instant i would be happy not even knowing he existed.
How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot! The world forgetting, by the world forgot. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd.
someone can come into your life and make you feel so wonderful, yet you are clearly uncompatiable. i dont want that happening to me. i hope and pray that it doesnt. i want to be happy, and i AM trying. i cant make you happy, if i'm not.
I'm just a fucked up girl who is looking for my own peace of mind. Don't assign me yours.
could i just take a quick peak into my future. just a quick glance at the page, just so i know ill be alright. please?
I don't know. Just wait... for a while.
stupid, brilliant movie. i hate it with the same passion in which i love it.
thank you
p.s. i got a new cell number: 562-841-5732. so everyone calllll me :) | | |
| I love this song.
Lemonade Ice Tea by Annie Bethancourt
He gave me everything--he gave me life.
Sunlight by day and starlight by night,
and when we came to a place that I didn’t know
he said to me “Will you go?”
Though I trembled and my knees felt weak to stand,
I felt power in the strength of his hand.
He said “There is so much that I want to show you--
will you go?”
And I said “I was born to love you,
though I never knew. Now I see the joy you
have for me, what else can I do?
I’ll run in the way your shadows fading,
climb the mountain where you’ll be,
run outside and dance with summer rain--
anything to bring you close to me.
Sit in my big and comfy chair
and drink my lemoande iced tea,
put on my coat and laugh with winter wind--
trying to bring you close to me.”
We travled for so long and I grew weaker more.
He wanted to keep going and I asked him what for.
He said “Just a little farther now and you will know.
” He asked me again “Will you go? Will you go?”
Night time came slowly and darkness faded in--
I couldn’t see myself and I couldn’t find him,
but his voice called out my name--beckoning me so.
He called to me “Will you go?” And I cried...
Well so many years have gone since my hand I pulled away,
but so many blessed times I had the strength to stay.
I struggle with it daily, though if he knows it doesn’t show. He still asks me: “Will you go?”
my prayer:
lead me lord, i will follow. even when i doubt i still praise you. for you have blessed me more than i can say. comfort me and take my worries. i love you. amen. | | |
| Long time no write dear Xanga!
the weekend was amazing as usual. some down points, like random memories, but there were so many better moments that just made things wonderful.
life is grand. i know tomorrow ill be like "stupid life i hate it." i actually fear the time ill say it again. because i am really truly happy right now, inspite of some hardcore obstacles. stupid quarter life crisis. it makes you so bi-polar.
i really just dont know what to write anymore. i dont feel like describing my weekend because it was too chaotic and full of fun. key words:
party,pool,boys,hookah,birthdays,girls, love,
drinks,cars,thoughts,movies,relax,sun,beach,dancing,clubbing,etc.
i think thats enough.
Me 3 days ago:
AFTER AN HOUR IN THE SUN!!!!
holy moly. anyway, that about all for now <3 | | |
| i woke up today, and everyone was gone. i had a really bad headache so i missed church. but when i woke up and didnt see anyone, i felt really sad.. how weird. i really wanted to go to church and worship, i'll go tonite. i did my own little mini church. sang some songs, and read from Proverbs.
Lavishly our lives are wasted
Humbleness is left untasted
You can't live your life to please yourself,
That's a tip from my mistakes
Exactly what it doesn't take
To win you've got to come in last place
To live your life you've got to lose it
And all the losers get a crown
In your weakness He is stronger
In your darkness He shines through
When you're crying He's your comfort
When you're all alone He's carrying you
Proverbs
those are just some verses that stuck out to me as i read. very amazing words there. amen.
p.s. if anyone has any prayer requests, send them my way. i want to pray for you all. xoxo
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| Hey, its Jaime.
so i decided to get a Xanga...i dont know why. I guess so that people who have this instead of livejournal, can still read whats going on. I will just be copying and pasting entries. no biggie.  xo. | | |
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